Karaoke: Hammersley Style
by PunkPrincess145
Summary: Set about 8 months after Season 4. What happens when crew old and new get together for drinks at a karaoke bar?
1. Prelude

A/N: This is only supposed to be a little piece, but I promise I'll keep it going if some of you like it. It has a little bit of Kate/Mike in it but it's mostly just something to distract me from the my exams coming up in a few weeks.

If I owned would I be writing this or would you be seeing it on the television?

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How on earth did I get here? Oh right it would probably have something to do with the two brunette demons-in-disguise sitting next to my 'wonderful' boyfriend. The man in question is grinning up at me like an idiot so I'm glaring back at him. Hang on you don't have any idea who or where I am do you? Let me start at the beginning.

* * *

My name is Lieutenant Katline McGregor, Commanding Officer of the HMAS Hammersley. Among those under my command are Dylan "Dutchy" Mulholland, Chris "Swain" Blake, Robert "RO" Dixon and Leo "2-Dads" Kosov-Meyer. Rebecca "Bomber" Brown had transferred off the boat around the same time that I had been promoted and Andy "Charge" Thorpe resigned his commission about 6 months ago. That's why we had agreed on these nights a long time ago. We had made a pact to get together at least every 2 months to stay in touch and keep our friendship alive and burning. Tonight, our boats had finally come into port and were going to be here for a few days. That was why Nav had decided that we were all going to meet up tonight for drinks. What we didn't know was that she had chosen a karaoke bar…actually thinking back I think she might have confided in 2-Dads. The realisation had finally come to me after…3 hours. Oops. I probably should have picked that up earlier. I'll fill you in on the events of the last few hours and you can figure out why I've come to my conclusion.

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A/N: So this is a little short but I swear the next chapter will be up real soon. Also I already have songs for Kate and 2-Dads but I need suggestions for anyone else.


	2. Chapter 1

**Don't own ****Sea Patrol so don't sue me!**

* * *

This morning the HMAS Hammersley had pulled into harbour and my crew had discovered that the HMAS Cairns and the HMAS Kingston were in port.

This meant that, to their delight (and mine although at this point I'm certainly not going to admit it to them), that everyone was in port. It's been a few months since we all managed to get together since every time we tried it one or the other of our ships would end up being crash sailed. Lucky for us, when 2-Dads managed to get a hold of Bomber she was able to tell us that she'd already spoken to Nav and both the Cairns and the Kingston had a few days shore leave-we'd already discovered that with all of us spread out like this the trouble that Mike had usually been reserved to finding had been spread out between the boats. Apparently the Cairns had just had a week long stint dealing with the Feds since they'd managed to find a dead body (Bomber had assured us that as long as she stayed in their kitchen the crew didn't mind dealing with strange situations now and then) and the Kingston had been on aid work in one of the island chains around Australia (Nav had apparently promised a good story for tonight).

I knew personally that we had no chance of being crash sailed since we had just returned from our own small dramas regarding arms smugglers (it was interesting, at least until Dutchy decided to take two of them on by himself) so when 2-Dads said that Nav wanted to meet up and would it be alright for us all to get shore leave I had no problem with giving into the request and leaving my new XO on watch. As long as all of their work was done before hand of course. Of course, once faced with the prospect of actually managing to catch up with everyone my boys (because over the past few months the original sailors that I started out with before Mike left Hammersley for good have managed to become 'mine') finished up their work in record time and were ready to leave before I was. By the time I finished Dutchy was the only one waiting for me although since he was talking to our new navigator I'm still not sure whether he was waiting for me or flirting with her (the whole crew reckon that he's sweet on her, so much so that there's a betting pool that I'm not supposed to know about going on to do with when he's going to convince her to sleep with him) even after he assured me that he had been charged with my safety since the other guys had claimed that I was taking too long to get ready. I was contemplating reminding him that I was a trained member of the Navy who had managed to take care of myself on countless boarding's even when he himself put me in danger but decided against it when I realised that he was more than likely just going to laugh at me anyway. It would have been better if he had laughed at me rather than anyone else because he would at least keep it to himself whereas anyone else (2-Dads!) would have it spread around the crew by morning.

Anyway by the time we arrived at the bar the two of us had gone from Dutchy and Ma'am to Kate and Dylan (we had become friends over the past few months since he had become the one watching my back after I had let slip that I didn't trust my new XO). We had walked in and were assaulted by the singing coming from the front of the room. Dutchy and I shared a look before cautiously making our way to the large table that was mostly occupied by our friends. The boys rose to greet us but were out shadowed by Bomber and Nav who flew towards us with an (extremely loud!) squeal. After the requisite greetings and the hello kiss from Mike (which garnered an "Ooh" from everyone else) the most pressing question was what we were doing in a karaoke bar to which Nav replied that she thought it would be 'fun'. I wasn't sure whether she was talking my idea of fun or her idea of fun but I had a feeling it was probably her idea. We talked a little, drank a lot before it was announced that a "Mr Kosov-Meyer" was going to sing. We all looked up as the music started and the only thing running through my head was Oh my Goodness and then "I'm going to kill him".

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**So what did you think? I still need songs for pretty much everyone and bonus points to anyone who can guess what song 2-Dads is going to sing and why Kate is going to kill him (they have something to do with each other). Bonus points already to **Sea-Patrol-NCIS-freak **who gave me a great idea to do a couple of group numbers so I need a song for the ladies. See you next time.**


	3. Chapter 2

**Don't own**

**Slight spoilers for Season 1, Episode 8 "Through the Storm"**

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By the time that the first bars of 2-Dads song had started I had already threatened bodily harm under my breath which had only caused Mike to snigger and wrap his arm around my shoulder. You see, a few years ago, back when we still had Toby "Chefo" Jones cooking for us, he decided to get married. And at that particular time he decided to get married. Spider (being Spider) decided to put on a, a show for lack of a better word, at his engagement party. Since this "show" involved Spider putting on a sailor's uniform with a card saying "XO" on the chest and a blonde wig and pretending to be me I don't think that either I or Mike were meant to see it but because ET filmed it over a boarding tape that Mike was watching and because I walked in at the right time to talk to him we got a pretty good look at it, despite Mikes best efforts to keep it from me. And some how I was now looking at 2-Dads wearing said uniform and wig, although thankfully without the name tag. Judging from the sniggers around me most of the original crew were now remembering that particular incident. Since I couldn't move I settled for sending death glares at the man currently on stage as well as plotting out my revenge in my head. Unfortunately for us, or perhaps fortunately, by this time we had figured out that 2-Dads really can not sing (he had tried to instigate a singing day on board which had escaped my detection until he had started singing in the bridge and I had caught half of the crew threatening to push him off the boat if he ever did it again and the other half fleeing the scene as fast as humanly possible) so my crew had already blocked their ears by the time he opened his mouth which left anyone who had already left Hammersley to discover this fact in a rather…painful manner.

_Hi Barbie! _

_Hi Ken!_  
_You wanna go for a ride? _

_Sure, Ken!_  
_Jump in!_  
_Ha ha ha ha!I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world_  
_Life in plastic, it's fantastic_  
_You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere_  
_Imagination, life is your creation_

_Come on, Barbie, let's go party_

_I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world_  
_Life in plastic, it's fantastic_  
_You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere_  
_Imagination, life is your creation_

_I'm a blonde single girl in the fantasy world_  
_Dress me up, take your time, I'm your dollie_  
_You're my doll, rock and roll, feel the glamour and pain_  
_Kiss me here, touch me there, hanky-panky_

_You can touch, you can play_  
_You can say I'm always yours, oooh whoa_

_I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world_  
_Life in plastic, it's fantastic_  
_You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere_  
_Imagination, life is your creation_

_Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ha ha ha, yeah_  
_Come on, Barbie, let's go party, oooh, oooh_  
_Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ha ha ha, yeah_  
_Come on, Barbie, let's go party, oooh, oooh_

_Make me walk, make me talk, do whatever you please_  
_I can act like a star, I can beg on my knees_  
_Come jump in, be my friend, let us do it again_  
_Hit the town, fool around, let's go party_

_You can touch, you can play_  
_You can say I'm always yours_  
_You can touch, you can play_  
_You can say I'm always yours_

_Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ha ha ha, yeah_  
_Come on, Barbie, let's go party, oooh, oooh_  
_Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ha ha ha, yeah_  
_Come on, Barbie, let's go party, oooh, oooh_

_I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world_  
_Life in plastic, it's fantastic_  
_You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere_  
_Imagination, life is your creation_

_I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world_  
_Life in plastic, it's fantastic_  
_You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere_  
_Imagination, life is your creation_

_Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ha ha ha, yeah_  
_Come on, Barbie, let's go party, oooh, oooh_  
_Come on, Barbie, let's go party, ha ha ha, yeah_  
_Come on, Barbie, let's go party, oooh, oooh_

_Oh, I'm having so much fun!_  
_Well, Barbie, we're just getting started!_  
_Oh, I love you Ken!_

By the time he had finished singing everyone at our table had blocked their ears and once they finally realised that it was over unblocked them. Of course, at this point 2-Dads offered to sing another to 'get us in the mood' which led to Buffer and Dutchy leaping up and forcibly removing him from the stage and ordering him to buy the next round before Nav took the stage. At this point I was simply praying that whatever she chose would be appropriate before the music started to play.

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**I apologise for this taking so long, RL got in the way a bit but there have been a few PM's and reviews coming in asking for the next part so here it is. Please review.**


End file.
